discipline

The Gift of Time

If you have experience as a parent, whether recently or in the more distant past, one of the greatest gifts you can offer a relative or friend with a fussy baby is a brief respite. This is particularly important for single moms, but even a married mother may have a husband who isn't much help when the baby is having full-throttle colic. And a baby who cries nonstop can wear out both Mom and Dad before much time has passed.

The sound of someone else's baby crying is not nearly as nerve-wracking as it is for the mother or father of the child. You may also be able to model some perspective, a reminder of the preciousness of this new life, by cooing and fussing over a baby who may not seem very lovable to her parents at this particular moment.

Take the initiative in asking a new parent how life with the new arrival is going, and in particular if there are any problems with fussing and crying. If you have time, energy and child rearing skills, offer to look after the baby for a while. You might suggest a specific time ("How about if I come over tomorrow or Wednesday night around six, so you can get out for a couple of hours?") rather than something vague ("Let me know if I can help you"), which may be more difficult to accept without sounding utterly desperate.

Your offer to provide a time-out for a frazzled parent may be far more valuable than any baby-shower gift.

Background Information

Journey of No Return
Sometimes as parents, we have a knee-jerk response to our kids as we're barraged by their numerous inquires and desires. Maybe it's time to stop being so negative.

When Not To Discipline
Parents should recognize when they should and shouldn't discipline their children.

When You Feel Like Calling in the SWAT Team
Are your children constantly testing you? This classic parenting advice will help you regain the upper hand.

Questions and Answers

After I spank my child, she usually wants to hug me and make up, but I continue to be cool to her for a few hours. Do you think that is right?
Answer

We'd like to be more unified in our approach, but how do we successfully move from two financial approaches to one?
Answer

How long do you think a child should be allowed to cry after being punished? Is there a limit?
Answer

I have never spanked my 3-year-old because I am afraid it will teach her to hit others and be a violent person. Do you think I am wrong?
Answer

It just seems barbaric to cause pain to a defenseless child. Is it healthy to spank him or her?
Answer

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Stories

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Other Things to Consider

Ten Things Toddlers Wish They Could Tell You
It can do wonders for the frazzled parent to know what's going on in the mind of your little one.

TransitionsHaving a Baby, Preparing for Adolescence

Life PressuresWorking Moms, Stay-At-Home Moms, Time for Family

RelationshipsParents and Adult Children, Blended Families