crisis pregnancy

Live and Let Live

There are no really definitive reasons "why" a teenager takes his or her own life. Often, a suicide appears to be an attempt to resolve a conflict by which the teen feels entrapped. This conflict may involve friends, parents, boyfriends or girlfriends, or even school and church groups.

Personal losses, such as the death of a loved one, disruption of the family unit by divorce, or any matter that the teen perceives to be a personal, irrevocable failure, may become a precipitating event. Guilt, or fear of the consequences of such matters as legal involvements or pregnancy may again create an overwhelming conflict in an adolescent's life.1

  • The key to prevention of teen suicides is to alert and mobilize parents, teachers, friends, health personnel and other potential rescuers, teaching them to recognize high-risk teens, or behavioral clues preceding a suicide attempt and how to intervene. Sari2 Surprisingly, an estimated 80 percent of suicide victims mention their intent before their attempts. 3
  • We must ask in order to know. Remember that thoughts of suicide need to be brought into the open for you to be able to help. Asking about suicide will not plant the idea of suicide in the mind of someone who is not already contemplating it. It will often offer the relief of being able to talk about it to someone who is thinking about it. Take a supportive attitude and encourage a young person; that's the best first step. Remember that people contemplating suicide are usually ambivalent about living or dying.4 Therefore, they need suggestions of hope, and the support of someone who will point out reasons to live.
  • If you suspect an adolescent is suicidal, maintain frequent and open contact. Encourage them to call or to stop by in person. Listen to everything they have to say — and then offer hope. For example, "I'm glad we can talk about this," and "I believe there is help for you." Try to pinpoint the problems and listen to the story, his or her previous attempts to cope and what the current problem is. Try to focus on his or her feelings and try not to moralize. Exploring his reasons for wanting to die can help to break up feelings of overwhelming helplessness into more manageable portions.5
  • Referral to professionals trained in intervention is a wise course of action. Professional intervention will include assessment of the teenager's risk of suicide and treatment, help through counseling, and possibly medication. A teen may be treated as an outpatient or during hospitalization, according to the assessed danger. Important aspects of any treatment include mobilizing family support for therapy, discussion and increasing observation of the patient.6 The patient's home must be cleared of any potentially lethal weapons.7 The counselor may ask the patient and family to initiate a "contract" to assure the patient's safety during the time of healing. Friends who offer acceptance and support are also of major importance.
1 Robert B. Shearin, "Suicide and Depression," Adolescent Medicine (Kalamazoo, Mich.: Upjohn Co., 1983), 131.
2 Staver, "Help Prevent Teen Suicides, MDs Urged," American Medical News, 230/30 November 1984: 39.
3 H. Norman Wright, "The Crisis of Suicide," Crisis Counseling (San Bernardino, Calif." Here's Life Publishers, 1985), 100.
4 Leon Eisenberg, "Adolescent Suicide: On Taking Arms Against a Sea of Troubles," Pediatrics 66 (July 1980), 319.
5 Wright, 108-110.
6 Shearin, 130-131.
7 Eisenberg, 317.

Background Information

Behind the Scenes of a Teen Pregnancy
A look at the thoughts and feelings she — and you — are going through.

Abortion Risks
While abortion seems like a "quick fix" for a long-term problem, it is a permanent decision that carries physical, emotional and spiritual risks.

Deciding About Adoption
When considering adoption as an alterative to raising your baby, these answers may dispel adoption myths.

Questions and Answers

Why do I feel like this pregnancy has pulled me in so many different directions? I feel so overwhelmed with all the ramifications of this decision I must make. How can I sort it all out?
Answer

My pregnant daughter has her whole life still ahead of her. Would it be better for her to place her baby with a family through adoption, parent her baby or have an abortion?
Answer

Review Frequently Asked Questions

Stories

Things Seen and Unseen
A woman in a white coat walked into the room and flipped on the fluorescent lights, jarring my wife awake. The jarring was just beginning.

Left to Suffer
Abortion can leave a woman feeling more empty and alone than she ever dreamed possible.

Life is Sacred
Sometimes the choices we make bring pain. Thankfully, one woman turned to God for healing.

Taboo Grief: Men and Abortion
It's not something most men talk about, but the ones who've lost a child to abortion bear many scars.

If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.
Share Your Story

Other Things to Consider

Faith Helps
God may be the only person who understands what you're going through.

What the Choice is All About
For a long time it baffled me. I could never understand why anyone would want to be pro-choice. But this past week I finally got it.

RelationshipsBlended Families, Parents and Adult Children

TransitionsPreparing for Adolescence, Empty Nest