adoption
Make Room For Baby
When one mother brought home a new baby boy, the former youngest took one look ... and bit her mother in the knee out of resentment.
Many children feel threatened when a new baby arrives and becomes the center of attention. While this reaction is normal, here are some tips to minimize bites and bitterness.
- Start preparing your child during the pregnancy. Teach your child how to hold a baby doll with care. Use phrases like "be gentle with the baby" so when the real baby arrives, your child will understand how to behave. Three- and 4-year-olds have difficulty understanding time, so it is better to associate the baby's arrival with a season rather than a month.
- Make the baby's arrival a positive memory. When the baby is born, allow your child to visit the hospital. Greet your child without the baby in your arms. This way you can hug her and let her know how much you missed her. After this time together, let her see the new baby. A special gift from the new baby may help older children appreciate the newest addition.
- Understand that your child will have mixed emotions. Some toddlers regress when a new baby enters the home. Bedwetting, whining and begging for a bottle are a common plea for parental attention. Remind your child of all the things he can do that the baby cannot and all he can teach the new baby.
- Emphasize the older child's important role . Let your child know how special she is because she can be a helper. To provide a sense of importance and the pride of accomplishment, let your child be involved in caring for the baby. For example, allow your child to choose the baby's outfit.
- Affirm your older child. When others compliment your new baby, they often ignore the older child. Praise your older child in front of others. Encourage family members and friends not to forget to make the older sibling feel special, too.
For some children, this transition can be difficult with plenty of tears and tantrums. But with a little sensitivity and effort, an irreplaceable friendship can be formed between the new siblings.
Background Information
Agency Adoptions
When it is time to evaluate adoption agencies, consider these pros and cons.
Where Have All the Babies Gone?
The top reasons fewer babies are available to the growing number of couples who want to adopt.
Adopting on Your Own
This advice can help single parents who want to adopt children.
Causes and Characteristics of Attachment Disorder
For adoptive parents, attachment issues can be a huge concern.
Independent Adoption
These are the risks and rewards of adopting without the help of an agency.
Questions and Answers
Are adopted children more likely to be rebellious than children raised by biological parents?
Answer
How would you go about telling a child he or she is adopted, and when should that disclosure occur?
Answer
Review Frequently Asked Questions
Stories
Reflections on Bonding With an Adopted Child
Bonding with an adopted child can take time — and great patience.
A Second Chance at Life
Two adopted children arrived from the most unlikely of sources.
Adoption as Grace
How does enlarging your family reflect God's love?
An Act of Grace
In the midst of ethical ambiguity, one infertility treatment is a welcome development.
Climbing the Hills
A father tells his story of adopting his daughter from Russia.
If you've been through a experience related to this topic, we invite you to share your story with others.Share Your Story
Other Things to Consider
Where is God in the Midst of All My Troubles?
So many cry out to Him in times of need, but is God really listening? And, more important, does He care?
Related Topics
Life Pressures: Working Moms, Stay-at-Home Moms
Relationships: Blended Families, Divorce, Parents and Adult Children, Caring for Elderly Parents
